Likely's Whore-Box


Praise For Lord Likely

"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."

THE DAILY NEWS SHEET

"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."

THE LONDON LOOKER

"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."

LORD FISHSTICK'S NEWSPAPER

"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."

THE ILLUSTRATED JOURNAL OF NEWS

"Hear ye, hear ye, Lord Likely is fucking ace!"

THE TOWN CRIER

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  • The Crest of Lord Likely

    20 November 2014

    In Which I Outsmart Mr. Sherlock Holmes

    AS regular readers will know, I have had something of a long-running feud with that sickeningly smug sleuth, Mr. Sherlock Holmes. Even writing that cove’s name is enough to make me want to vomit all over my hands.

    Well, happily today I can say that I have well and truly got one over on him, by sneaking my noble self into a story all about him! HA!

    The tale in question is entitled ‘The Facebook of Sherlock Holmes,’ and is the work of my no-good scribe, Mr. A.D Fanton, esquire. This comic-strip adventure for Mr. Holmes appears in the latest issue of the adult comic (surely an oxymoron), ‘Viz’, which goes on sale in shops to-day.

    Unbeknownst to Mr. Holmes, however, I could not let him have all the glory in this latest escapade, so ensured (through a mixture of violent lashes and verbal abuse directed at Mr. Fanton) that I too would appear in the story. And behold, all my efforts were not in vain, for there I am, in all my glory:

    Ha-HA! I’d wager that the so-called ‘Great Detective’ did not see that one coming! Victory is mine!

    The above adventure appears in Viz Comic, number 241, which you may purchase from the shops for £3.20, and then you may wave it in the dopey detective’s startled, big-conked face.

    ‘Twas all rather elementary, in the end…

    - Lord Likely.

    Posted in Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

    12 September 2014

    Extra! Extra!

    Lord Likely announces the launch of his Magnificent Mailing List!

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

    10 September 2014

    Duck Me

    Lord Likely unearths a forgotten oddity from his publishing past.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

    07 September 2014

    A Study in Strumpets and a Curious Conspiracy

    Lord Likely announces the imminent publication of his first electronic book – but is there a conspiracy to stop him?

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 1 Remarkable Remark »

    14 July 2014

    Fifteen And A Half Hilarious Victorian Jokes That Would Even Make Her Majesty Laugh

    Lord Likely present fifteen and a half genuine Victorian rib-ticklers for your amusement. You are welcome, world.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 45 Remarkable Remarks »

    11 July 2014

    Ten Victorian Insults To Make Your Enemies Crumble

    His Lordship shares ten Victorian vulgarities with which to strike down your worst enemy.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

    25 November 2013

    An Astonishing and Arousing Announcement

    ‘Tis the most important literary event since Mr. William Shakespeare bought his first quill.  Further updates to follow, ladies and gentle-men! In the meantime, please do spread the word – LORD LIKELY IS COMING! – Lord Likely.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 1 Remarkable Remark »

    11 September 2013

    Taking the Pith

    Lord Likely gives a thorough review of issue two of ‘Professor Elemental Comics’.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 1 Remarkable Remark »

    29 June 2013

    Gladstonebury

      Now THIS is what you call a festival.   – Lord Likely. 

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

    08 March 2013

    Lord Save the Queen

    Lord Likely reveals details of his all-new adventure – coming soon!

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

    13 February 2013

    In Which His Lordship Gives You His Heart

    AND they say that romance is dead. TSK. Happy Valentine’s Day to all you lovers out there! – Lord Likely. 

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 2 Remarkable Remarks »

    31 October 2012

    Lord Likely’s Halloween Horror: Last Orders

    Lord Likely presents a spine-chilling tale for Hallowe’en…

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Adventures Thus Far, Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

    11 July 2012

    Louis Pasteur: Kraken Slayer

    Mr Louis Paster battles a fearsome KRAKEN.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 6 Remarkable Remarks »

    26 May 2012

    Upper Class Twitter

    Lord Likely celebrates four-and-a-half years of his use of the Twitter Device.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 2 Remarkable Remarks »

    06 May 2012

    Telegram Sex

    Lord Likely tries a new form of long-distance love-making.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | 5 Remarkable Remarks »

    02 May 2012

    Look Likely

    His lordship dispenses invaluable fitness advice.

    Read on, dear readers...

    Posted in Random Insertions | No Remarkable Remarks »

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    About His Lordship

    Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.

    Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing

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