Likely's Whore-Box

Praise For Lord Likely

"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."


"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."


"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."


"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."


"Hear ye, hear ye, Lord Likely is fucking ace!"


Approved By Liberals


Advertisements & Announcements

  • adver_maid
  • advert_woman
  • advert_moustaches
  • The Crest of Lord Likely

    Introducing Lord Likely-Aristocratic Adventurer

    Welcome, dear reader, to my incredible and, quite frankly, powerfully erotic journals.

    If this is your first visit here, then where in the name of dickery have you been? You’ve missed a hell of a lot of astonishing adventures, let me tell you. But it’s alright. I forgive you. We all have to start somewhere, I suppose.

    Allow me to introduce myself. I am Lord Likely, Victorian aristocrat, adventurer and full-time hedonist. Not to put too fine a point on it, I am a legend in my own life-time, and I rather fancy I shall be a legend in everyone’s lifetime henceforth. I really am cocking-well fantastic.

    When I am not attending to my lordly duties, such as attending banquets and balls, or lounging about languidly in my spacious mansion here on the Likely Estate, I like nothing more than finding myself embroiled in a fresh new mystery or embarking on an unplanned expedition. It really does get my blood pumping, and my heart racing, and makes for the most invigorating distraction from my day-to-day chores.

    Accompanying me on my adventures is my man-servant, the eternally foul and completely wretched oaf, Botter. Botter has been in my employ for nigh on twenty-two years now, and quite frankly it does feel like a day too much. Still, he does do his job with something approaching competence, and if he ever talks
    back or demands payment or complains that I have accidentally shot him in the leg again, then he is quickly silenced with a firm beating from my cane. It does make for a jolly rigourous exercise, I can tell you.

    I am also joined in my exploits by another faithful companion: Lord Palmerston, not to be confused with the current Prime Minister of Great Britain with whom he shares the name. My Lord Palmerston is in fact a nick-name I have bestowed upon my proud, mighty penis, an organ so gargantuan that I usually wind up
    having to buy it a ticket should I ever find myself forced to use public transport. My Lord Palmerston and I are extremely close, almost like we are joined at the groin. Which, of course, we are.

    Lord Palmerston is kept very active on my adventures, as I have an extremely healthy sexual appetite. So ravenous is my hunger for intercourse that were one to replace women with pies in this equation, I dare say I would be morbidly obese and probably heading for my fifteenth heart-attack. I cannot help it, though. I just find women so God-damned attractive. I love everything about them, especially their breasts and vaginas. God Almighty certainly got things right when he designed the female form. Good show, Heavenly Father!

    When I am not pumping ladies left, right and centre (and in countless other directions besides), I do manage to aid the police force in solving all manner of mystifying mysteries and curious cases. Indeed, I think at the last count the tally of solved crimes was firmly in my favour, a fact which has not escaped London’s police force, resulting in my constant re-employment by the city’s officers whenever they find themselves stumped by a crime, which is very frequently indeed.

    Among my contacts within the department is one Inspector Albert Spunkleford, a rather clueless fellow who seems to be constantly on the verge of some kind of psychological breakdown. He also always seems to be berating me for failing to follow one procedure or other, or for having sex when I should be searching for
    clues. Spunkleford chastises me so often, that sometimes I think my first name is ‘Jesus Christ’, on account of the amount of times I have heard the phrase, “Jesus Christ Likely!” uttered in reference to my wondrous self.

    Aside from all that, I also enjoy a drop of whisky (more than one drop is preferable, however;) I adore fencing and sword-play; I am infatuated with Her Majesty, Queen Victoria and I am also partial to kicking beggars when I am out and about in the town. Grasping little bastards.

    In conclusion, then, dear reader: I am, quite simply, fucking amazing.

    Enjoy the journals.

    Lord Likely.


    11 incredible interjections thus far.

    RegexHacks :: Blog » A Contentmas Epiphany

    […] about putting in some hours creating a glorious about me page, with a biography, nice picture, and where you spend your time […]

    RegexHacks :: Blog » A Contentmas Epiphany, December 21st, 2010 at 3:22 pm

    A Contentmas Epiphany | Web Design Feed

    […] about putting in some hours creating a glorious about me page, with a biography, nice picture, and where you spend your time […]

    A Contentmas Epiphany | Web Design Feed, February 4th, 2011 at 12:01 pm

    The Likely Letters – Part One

    […] Home […]

    The Likely Letters – Part One, February 9th, 2011 at 5:36 pm

    30 Inspiring “About Me” Pages

    […] Lord Likely […]

    30 Inspiring “About Me” Pages, May 25th, 2011 at 12:51 pm

    30 Inspiring “About Me” Pages |

    […] Lord Likely […]

    30 Inspiring “About Me” Pages |, May 26th, 2011 at 12:35 pm

    30 вдохновляющих страниц “About”

    […] Lord Likely […]

    30 вдохновляющих страниц “About”, May 28th, 2011 at 12:50 pm

    A Contentmas Epiphany | Red7six

    […] about putting in some hours creating a glorious about me page, with a biography, nice picture, and where you spend your time […]

    A Contentmas Epiphany | Red7six, November 13th, 2011 at 9:31 am

    A Contentmas Epiphany | autoblog

    […] about putting in some hours creating a glorious about me page, with a biography, nice picture, and where you spend your time […]

    A Contentmas Epiphany | autoblog, November 22nd, 2011 at 1:18 am

    30 Inspiring About Me Pages ! | Design Inspiration Hub !

    […] Lord Likely […]

    30 Inspiring About Me Pages ! | Design Inspiration Hub !, May 7th, 2012 at 12:35 pm

    design-showcase-inspiration « Design « Projects at SwaggerUnit

    […] Lord Likely […]

    design-showcase-inspiration « Design « Projects at SwaggerUnit, September 18th, 2012 at 9:21 am

    30 Inspiring “About Me” Pages - Seenublog

    […] Lord Likely […]

    30 Inspiring “About Me” Pages - Seenublog, January 23rd, 2016 at 4:21 pm

    Purchase Fine Wares!

    About His Lordship

    Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.

    Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing

    Peruse Further...

    Contact His Lordship!

    Send his lordship your letters, nude pictographs, declarations of love and wads of cash by clicking upon the most handsome stamp above!

    Enjoyed the journals? Then why not donate a few shillings, by clicking 'pon the button above!

    All funds raised go towards his lordship's drinking fund, with absolutely NO proceeds going to the homeless or any other filthy wastrels

    The Likely Empire


    Lord Likely's Incredible SUBSCRIBE-O-HAT subscribe-o-hat Click 'pon the hat and ne'er miss a single chapter of his Lordship's adventures.

    Letters To His Lordship

    Please use this form to direct all mail, cash bribes and offers of marriage and/or intercourse:

    Contact Form

    cforms contact form by delicious:days