Pseudonymph, my incredible length and breadth often leave women breathless, I must say.

rickey henderson, good luck with your wooing, sir. And do not forget to name you first-born after me!

treadmarkz, they’re not ALL about semen. One of them is about urine, thus clearly demonstrating my wild diversity.

The Shark Guys, ’tis always a pleasure to hear from the colonials! Have you made me your sovereign yet?

Dear Theresa, there is indeed a place called Cockermouth, located in Cumbria, in the Lake District. As for my poetry being too ‘in your face’…well, I cannot deny it. I am frequently in the faces of many a maiden.

Toodle-pip!

- Lord Likely.

Lord Likely your self expressive poetry is a real eye opener and tends to put it all out there. COuld you perchance write a poem that doesn’t scream “In your face?” SOmething tender and chastely romantic. I understand it might be a real test to someone of your vast experience, but it would prove to your readers that there is that true gentleman side to your extreme nature. Do give it a go and let me know whence it has been posted.

Lady Laura

Mr. Bananas, the idea of Her Majesty ‘having’ a Brazilian has made feel rather giddy with excitement!

Alex L, anyone who is not moved by my beautiful verse is clearly a heartless monster, or possibly dead.

Nurse Myra, nothing would please me more! Next time I am Down Under, you shall have to go down under, m’dear!

Roufa & Mimi, I am glad to have touched you both.

My dear Olga, my talent runs so deeply, I have to employ miners to fetch it from the very core of my soul!

Chelle, I would like to take the credit for being the first to use ‘arse-hole’ in poetry, but I do believe Shakespeare did pen a sonnet entitled ‘The Glittering Arse-Hole’. It was beautiful.

jeffman, fear not, sir – swift, brutal justice will be meted out to this Ayres woman. POETIC JUSTICE.

Tiggy, thank you, m’dear. I am so very glad that you enjoyed my spunk.

ettarose, I often find myself rendering ladies speechless. Then again, it is only to be expected. One should never talk with one’s mouth full.

Toodle-pip!

- Lord Likely.

I do seem to recall her reducing Alan Titchmarsh to tears with a showstopping rendition of ‘An Ode to Queen Victoria’ on Pebble Mill at One, back in the eighties.

I do trust his lordship will be demonstrating his vigorous disapproval towards the Cornish minstrel, forthwith.