Good day, dear readers!

Behold a bold new era for my (frankly incredible) journals, as Mr. Isambard Kingdom Brunel has just completed his renovation of my diaries, resulting in the cock-stiffening, mimsy-moistening new look you are currently witnessing before your doubtlessly stunned eyeballs.

Mr. Brunel did take a day longer than I had hoped, but he cannot really be blamed. I did wind up treating him to a few drinks on Monday evening, which led to a few dozen drinks, which in turn led to a twelve-hour stay in the local hospital for the poor chap. Some people really cannot hold their booze, you know.

Luckily, Mr. Brunel is rather more adept at holding a hammer, and his work upon my journals is looking very nice indeed, even if I do say so myself. Which I do. Excitingly, I am told there are a few more changes to come, which has me pounding my Palmerston in erotic anticipation, frankly.

I do hope that you – my dear, darling and deliriously gorgeous readers – approve of the changes as well. Let me know by sending my some sort of communication, and I shall take the time to respond to you all. Unless your comment is negative, in which case I may just wipe my arse upon it and hurl it into a fire. (The comment, that is, not my arse.)

Many thanks to you all for bearing with us through these difficult – but knee-tremblingly exciting – times.

Toodle-pip!

- Lord Likely.

Next Time in The Astonishing Adventures of Lord Likely: More thrilling escapades and adventures!

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My name is Isambard Kingdom Brunel, engineer of such wonderful structures as the Great Western Railway, the Maidenhead Railway Bridge, several large ships and the double-buttocked bar-stool.

The esteemed and venerable aristocrat Lord Likely has given me the task of reconstructing his inter-net web-log, so that it may be refreshed and ‘one hundred per-cent sexier‘, to quote his lordship.

I gladly accepted the challenge, for I believe it will be one of the true tests of my engineering skills, and will push me on to greater heights than I e’er thought possible.

Plus his lordship has some incriminating photographic images of me indulging in some rather sordid shenanigans with a few parlour maids and a length of steel rod.

Work on the Lord Likely II, as I shall call it, will commence immediately and hopefully will be concluded on the twenty-ninth day of July in the year of our Lord eighteen fifty-seven. That is entirely dependent on how many tea-breaks my builders take during the works, of course.

It shall not be an easy undertaking. I shall have to reinforce the spunk girders, extend the fanny hole and make the necessary accommodations for his lordship’s considerable girth. But hopefully the end results will astound and stagger you all, and will lead to your juices ‘flowing like the mighty Niagara‘, as Lord Likely so eloquently puts it.

Do please bear with us during these exciting times.

Good-bye!

- Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

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