The Astonishing Adventures of Lord Likely

Lord Likely and the Bloody Nuisances

Monday, August 31st, 2009

NEW! A brand-new adventure for his lordship, as an evil presence threatens London Town – and this time, it is not one of Botter’s foul bottom-burps.

Be prepared for chills, thrills and all kinds of spills as Likely prepares to go up against some vile, Victorian vampires…

Tags: Bloody Nuisances, botter, Bram Stoker, Dr. Whelkbladder, Dracula, fiction, humour, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, Mr. Strix, murder, vampires

Posted in Lord Likely and the Bloody Nuisances | 4 Comments »

In Which Lord Likely Makes A Fist Of It

Friday, October 24th, 2008

September, 1857. “What in the name of all that is sacred and holy do you think you are doing?” bellowed Professor Ventricle, after I had punched him squarely in the face, strongly suspecting that he was none other than my arch-nemesis, Harold Loathsome, in some sort of shoddy disguise. “Give it up, Loathsome! Your terrible [...]

Tags: botter, fiction, Harold Loathsome, humour, Lord Likely, mimsy, Mr Bertrum Gumbumble, murder, Professor Ventricle, punch, St. Bumthrusty's, tits

Posted in Likely Vs Loathsome | 14 Comments »

Wretch in Peace?

Saturday, October 18th, 2008

September, 1857. Getting a new man-servant is an awful ball-ache, you know. And I should know, for I have had over twenty different servants in my lifetime, of varying degrees of uselessness. When my father, Lord Eustace Likely, disappeared from the Likely Estate, ne’er to return (and now presumed deceased), I was left in the [...]

Tags: botter, fiction, Harold Loathsome, humour, Lord Likely, Mr Bertrum Gumbumble, murder, mystery, Professor Ventricle, St. Bumthrusty's

Posted in Likely Vs Loathsome | 14 Comments »

Lord Likely is Wrong

Monday, October 13th, 2008

September, 1857. While my wretched man-servant Botter may well have been in great danger at the murderous hands of my arch-nemesis Harold Loathsome, I saw no reason to cut short my current orgiastic duties with the delectable Miss Lizzie Flapkiss and company. It is awfully bad manners to pull out early, you know. Thus I [...]

Tags: botter, fiction, Harold Loathsome, humour, Inspector Spunkleford, Lizzie Flapkiss, Lord Likely, Mr Bertrum Gumbumble, murder, St. Bumthrusty's, wrong

Posted in Likely Vs Loathsome | 15 Comments »

Looking for Loathsome

Wednesday, October 1st, 2008

September, 1857. “Well, come on, man!” Spunkleford exclaimed. “Who exactly is this Loathsome fellow? Why do you suspect him of these terrible crimes? Speak up, man! Why must you keep us all in such terrible suspense?!” I was looking out of the school kitchen’s window, lost in a mixture of quiet contemplation and remembrance of [...]

Tags: Harold Loathsome, Inspector Spunkleford, Lizzie Flapkiss, Lord Likely, murder, reunion, school, Spotty Flapkiss, St. Bumthrusty's

Posted in Likely Vs Loathsome | 14 Comments »

Murder on the Menu

Friday, September 26th, 2008

September, 1857. “Oh dear,” I sighed, as we entered the kitchens of St. Bumthrusty’s. The scene was one of utter chaos; items of cutlery were strewn about the place, food items were spilt everywhere, and slumped next to the stove was the body of a man. I knelt down beside the corpse, which I noticed [...]

Tags: botter, Crotchy, eggs, fiction, Ginger Harrison, Ginger Nadgers, Harold Loathsome, humour, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, murder, St. Bumthrusty's, Victorian

Posted in Likely Vs Loathsome | 17 Comments »

Fists O’Fury

Monday, September 1st, 2008

September the First, 1857. It was a typical, completely unremarkable after-noon in London Town; carriages clattered noisily up and down the cobbled roads, smartly-dressed gentlemen doffed their hats as pretty ladies glided past them, cheeky cockney urchins weaved in and out of crowds, laughing and screaming as they did, while high above their heads Big [...]

Tags: Crimean War, fiction, fight, Finnegan 'Fists' O'Fury, grammar, humour, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, missive, murder, St. Bumthrusty's

Posted in Likely Vs Loathsome | 10 Comments »

Getting to Grips with Her Ladyship

Thursday, April 17th, 2008

April, 1857. “Your ladyship, I have decided I would like to commence my investigations by seeing the body,” I remarked, as I leaned casually against the banister of the stairs. “Well, good,” replied Lady Rydeham-Harde. “At last, some progress.” “Of course, when I say ‘the body’, I mean ‘your body’. And when I say ‘seeing’ [...]

Tags: botter, erection, Grimes, how's your father, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord and Lady Rydeham-Harde, Lord Likely, Lord Palmerston, maid, murder

Posted in The Beast With Two Backs | 15 Comments »

When In Doubt, Crack One Out

Friday, April 11th, 2008

April, 1857. Writing these very journals is usually an exceedingly simple task. Being so incredibly gifted and ridiculously talented, I find that writing is almost second-nature to me, like breathing, or love-making, or crapping into my man-servant’s bed. However, as my last entry proves, I was having great difficulty in penning an article worthy of [...]

Tags: Beast With Two Backs, botter, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord and Lady Rydeham-Harde, Lord Likely, Lord Palmerston, murder, onanism, Rydeham-Harde House, Victorian Housewives, wanking

Posted in The Beast With Two Backs | 18 Comments »

The mystery thickens, curdles and then goes off.

Thursday, December 6th, 2007

November, 1856.“Is there a doctor in the house?” I repeated to the crowd of stunned faces before me. No-one moved a muscle, until one rather plump woman stood up and pointed a shaking finger at the recently deceased fellow, lying in a pool of his own blood on the stage behind me, a solitary playing [...]

Tags: Archibald the Entirely Adequate, bastard zomibe, botter, Doctor Corkscrews, King of Spades, Lord Likely, murder, panic, theatre

Posted in The Curious Case of The Conjuring Calamity | 10 Comments »