The Astonishing Adventures of
Aristocratic Adventurer and Gentle-man of Action
"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."
THE DAILY NEWS SHEET
"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."
THE LONDON LOOKER
"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."
LORD FISHSTICK'S NEWSPAPER
"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."
THE ILLUSTRATED JOURNAL OF NEWS
"Hear ye, hear ye, Lord Likely is fucking ace!"
THE TOWN CRIER
Saturday, March 29th, 2008
or Lord Likely is One: The Final Chapter. March, 1857. Having been left a homeless wretch, caked in vomit and piss and with my natural sense of style and grace rent asunder, I was naturally more than a little displeased with those vagrant swines who had placed me in such a position. In fact, it [...]
Tags: beer, beggars, botter, cane, drunk, fight, finale, Kenneth the Hat, Lord Likely, party, piss
Posted in Likely Is One | 11 Comments »
Monday, March 24th, 2008
Somewhen, 1857. Now where was I? Ah, yes. In the gutter, in a pool of my own urine, apparently homeless and with no recollection of who I really was. In other (decidedly more succinct) words, I was in big trouble. I elected to try and get up, and maybe take a stroll to see if [...]
Tags: coin, ejaculate, homeless, Lord Likely, Lord Palmerston, masturbation, piss, Queen Victoria, shilling, street, vomit
Posted in Likely Is One | 14 Comments »
Sunday, March 16th, 2008
or Lord Likely is One, chapter number six. Date unknown, 1857. I awoke with the most awful of headaches. I am no stranger to hangovers, of course. My hedonistic lifestyle dictates that I often wake up with a fierce, pounding headache and with little or no recollection of the previous twenty-four hours. Indeed, the entire [...]
Tags: amnesia, booze, drunk, Fleet Street, hangover, homeless, Lord Likely, piss
Posted in Likely Is One | 18 Comments »
Thursday, March 13th, 2008
or Lord Likely is One, Chapter Number Five. Having pumped the incredibly freakish Jennifer, the Incredibly Freakish, and filled her with so much of my man-cream that she was nothing more than a walking, human éclair, I decided that it was high-time for a little light refreshment. I headed back to the scrap-yard, where I [...]
Tags: alcohol, beer, botter, drunk, homeless, Jennifer the Incredibly Freakish, Lord Likely, piss, tramps, urine
Posted in Likely Is One | 17 Comments »
Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.
Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing
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