Likely's Whore-Box


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"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."

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"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."

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"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."

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"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."

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  • The Crest of Lord Likely

    Posts Tagged ‘urine’

    A Nice Foamy Head

    Thursday, March 13th, 2008

    or Lord Likely is One, Chapter Number Five. Having pumped the incredibly freakish Jennifer, the Incredibly Freakish, and filled her with so much of my man-cream that she was nothing more than a walking, human éclair, I decided that it was high-time for a little light refreshment. I headed back to the scrap-yard, where I [...]

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    Posted in Likely Is One | 17 Comments »

    A Very Likely Christmas

    Friday, December 21st, 2007

    Presenting a special double-length festive adventure, in one giant, throbbing part. December, 1856. It was Christmas Eve, and I was in London Town, doing some last-minute Christmas shopping, for myself, of course. I had thus far treated myself to a solid-gold moustache comb, five bottles of whisky and a particularly pornographic pamphlet entitled ‘Shoeless Hussies’. [...]

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    Posted in Random Insertions | 16 Comments »

    Ladies I Have Loved and Lost

    Saturday, April 7th, 2007

    March, 1856 As Madam Darkness took me in her cold embrace, I came to recall my previous romantic entanglements, and how they came to end. I shall now record a selection of them here, as a warning to other men, lest they too are ensnared in the awful traps frequently laid by the female of [...]

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    Posted in The Riddle Of The Runaway Romanov | No Comments »

    Rushing to the Russians

    Thursday, March 29th, 2007

    March, 1856. Botter and I took a carriage to London Town, eager to get our teeth into another exciting adventure. Well, I was eager, at any rate. Botter complained about the whole affair, until I silenced him by hitting his testicles with a pipe. Unlike our carriage ride in our last adventure, this journey passed [...]

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    Posted in The Riddle Of The Runaway Romanov | 5 Comments »

    Beggars Can Be Choosers

    Thursday, March 1st, 2007

    2nd March 1856 (or thereabouts) Now, where was I? Ah, yes, heading to London Town to track down my would-be assassin. Well, having gathered our senses after our drunken debacle, Botter and I recommenced our journey. However, after a few hours of aimless wandering, we soon came to the inevitable conclusion that we were lost. [...]

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    Posted in The Peculiar Prostitute Predicament | No Comments »

    About His Lordship

    Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.

    Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing

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