The Astonishing Adventures of
Aristocratic Adventurer and Gentle-man of Action
"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."
THE DAILY NEWS SHEET
"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."
THE LONDON LOOKER
"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."
LORD FISHSTICK'S NEWSPAPER
"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."
THE ILLUSTRATED JOURNAL OF NEWS
"Hear ye, hear ye, Lord Likely is fucking ace!"
THE TOWN CRIER
Thursday, June 28th, 2007
June, 1856 With all this talk of my family, I decided to while away the time during our journey to Southampton by attempting to sketch out the Likely Family Tree. I say attempt, as any effort to trace my family’s roots is rather a chore, largely thank to my father’s various marriages and relationships. It […]
Tags: Likely, Likely Family Tree, Lord Eustace Likely
Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 10 Comments »
Monday, June 25th, 2007
June, 1856 Botter, having regained consciousness, prepared the carriage for our immediate departure to Southampton, from where we would sail to America. As he busily set about his task, I stood around looking handsome and suave, as is my wont. “Milord,”said Botter, as he set about tethering my fastest horse, Reynolds, to the carriage. “Forgive […]
Tags: botter, brother, carriage, children, Lord Eustace Likely, Ludlow Likely, Mandy Murkerfarker, Reynolds, seed, Southampton, United States of America
Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 12 Comments »
Wednesday, June 20th, 2007
June 2nd, 1856 It was a rather uneventful morning on the Likely Estate, with Botter dutifully taking my inside-leg measurements for a new pair of trousers. As I prefer to be naked when getting measured, this was proving to be rather a difficult task for my struggling servant, as my extremely massive manhood kept getting […]
Tags: botter, letter, Likely, Likely Estate, Lord Palmerston, penis, United States of America
Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 11 Comments »
Sunday, June 17th, 2007
June, 1856 Due to all my recent adventuring, and my time spent in the United States of America, I completely overlooked the birthday celebrations of our current, reigning monarch, Queen Victoria. This is a terrible oversight on my part. I usually make quite an occasion of her Majesty’s birthday (that being the twenty-fourth of May), […]
Tags: birthday, British Empire, celebrations, Queen Victoria, whisky
Posted in Random Insertions | 7 Comments »
Wednesday, June 13th, 2007
June 13th, 1856 Good day. I have just this moment returned to the Likely Estate, fresh from an astonishing adventure in our former colony of America. Of course, I say ‘fresh’, however I have spent the past five days cooped up in a tiny cabin on a rather run-down ship, with my stinking man-servant Botter […]
Tags: America, botter, fire, Likely Estate, Lord Likely, porn library, return
Posted in Uncategorized | 14 Comments »
Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.
Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing
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