The Astonishing Adventures of
Aristocratic Adventurer and Gentle-man of Action
"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."
THE DAILY NEWS SHEET
"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."
THE LONDON LOOKER
"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."
LORD FISHSTICK'S NEWSPAPER
"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."
THE ILLUSTRATED JOURNAL OF NEWS
"Hear ye, hear ye, Lord Likely is fucking ace!"
THE TOWN CRIER
Wednesday, December 31st, 2008
December the Thirty-First, 1857. AS 1857 slouches off into the distance like an elderly old man who has just soiled his undergarments, it is time to welcome in the far more sprightly (and far less urine-stained) new year. Huzzah! As well as heralding a night of unbridled drinking and revelry, the coming of a new [...]
Wednesday, December 24th, 2008
The following verse was composed by a young, brothel-owning woman, by the name of Ms. Elizabeth Stuffings, who had the pleasure of meeting my lordly self this Christmas Eve. The experience was so incredibly erotic and astonishing, that Ms. Stuffings was compelled to write about it almost immediately. Do please enjoy. ‘Twas the night before [...]
Monday, December 15th, 2008
November, 1857. “I SHALL indeed take the case!” I bellowed enthusiastically. “Provided I am sufficiently remunerated for my services, of course.” “Absolutely, Likely. We shall pay you your usual fee, of that there is no question!” replied Inspector Spunkleford. “Hmmm…no, dear inspector. Not this time. I think this time I should like to be paid [...]
Monday, December 8th, 2008
November, 1857. “LIE back and close your eyes, and I shall deliver a creamy surprise!” I said, as I unsheathed my raging Lord Palmerston, which was, by now, stiffer than a corpse lying in a lake on a freezing cold winter’s day. “Mmmm,” Mrs. Bapps replied, licking her lips. “Sounds delicious!” “Jolly good!” I said, [...]
Tuesday, December 2nd, 2008
November, 1857 “Well then, sir,” purred the beautiful, buxom baker Mrs. Bapps as she leant forward, giving me another glorious glimpse of her heaving bosom. “Do you see anything you would like?” “Rather!” I beamed. “Yes?” she continued, scooping up some cream from off of the top of a nearby cake with her finger, and [...]
Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.
Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousingPeruse Further...
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