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Likely's Whore-Box
Completed Tales
- The Likely Letters
- The Strange Case of the Sinister Snowman
- The Filching Fog of Finsbury Park
- Our Mutual Fiend
- Botter's Astonishing Adventure
- The Bloody Baffling Buckingham Bluff
- One Score and Four
- A Christmas Carry On
- Lord Likely and the Bloody Nuisances
- The Puzzling Pearl Necklace Puzzle
- The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane
- Likely Vs Loathsome
- Disaster At The Likely Estate
- The Beast With Two Backs
- Likely Is One
- Lord Likely And The Flash Man
- The Curious Case of The Conjuring Calamity
- An Astonishing American Adventure
- The Mystery of the Missing Moustache
- The Riddle Of The Runaway Romanov
- The Peculiar Prostitute Predicament
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THE LONDON LOOKER
"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."
LORD FISHSTICK'S NEWSPAPER
"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."
THE ILLUSTRATED JOURNAL OF NEWS
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The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane
Wherein Mrs. Bapps Is Given The Boot
Monday, February 2nd, 2009
Previously in The Astonishing Adventures of Lord Likely: this happened. November, 1857. “WELL, sir, what will you have become of me?” snarled Mrs. Bapps, as Botter carefully trained his rolling-pin on her. “Am I to be arrested, and hung for my crimes? Or will you just kill me now? What? What will you do?” “I […]
Tags: bootblack, botter, fiction, humour, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, Lord Palmerston, Mrs. Bapps, William Swishbuckle
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 14 Comments »
One in the Oven
Tuesday, January 27th, 2009
Previously in The Astonishing Adventures of Lord Likely: Having been hot on the trail of a villainous bootblack who was severing the feet of his customers, Lord Likely quickly discovered that the bootblack was merely a pawn in another diabolical scheme – Mrs. Bapps the baker had hired the fellow to remove the feet so […]
Tags: bootblack, botter, comedy, facebook, fiction, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, Mrs. Bapps, oven, twitter
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 12 Comments »
Lord Likely and the Cake of Doom
Monday, January 19th, 2009
Previously in The Astonishing Adventures of Lord Likely: His lordship, hot on the trail of a villainous bootblack who had been severing the feet of his customers, tracked down the cad in question and, through an ingenious use of origami, forced the bounder to confess to his crimes. However, the bootblack then surprised Likely by […]
Tags: bootblack, fiction, handcuffs, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Inspector Spunkleford, intercourse, Lord Likely, Mrs. Bapps, William Swishbuckle
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 9 Comments »
The Mystery Unfolds
Saturday, January 10th, 2009
November 1857. “RIGHT then, Squire,” said the brutish oaf in front of me, waving his hacksaw menacingly in my face. “You’re going to sit still and let me relieve you of your feet.” I closed my newspaper and sighed. As much as I loved adventuring in my naturally astonishing manner, sometimes I did rather wish […]
Tags: bootblack, fiction, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Jack, Lord Likely, Master Ai-Phor, Mrs. Bapps, origami, shoes, William Swishbuckle
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 12 Comments »
Shocking Shoe-Shine Shenanigans
Monday, January 5th, 2009
Previously in Lord Likely’s Incredible Inter-Active Adventure: Having been summoned to investigate a startlingly dull case involving the theft of a gentleman’s shoes by a tiny, cockney bootblack, Lord Likely quickly gets to work by visiting a nearby bakery and having a raunchy, pudding-based threesome with the owner, Mrs. Bapps, and one of her customers […]
Tags: bootblack, fiction, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Lord Likely, shit, shoes, Victorian
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 12 Comments »
In Which His Lordship Puts His Foot In It
Monday, December 15th, 2008
November, 1857. “I SHALL indeed take the case!” I bellowed enthusiastically. “Provided I am sufficiently remunerated for my services, of course.” “Absolutely, Likely. We shall pay you your usual fee, of that there is no question!” replied Inspector Spunkleford. “Hmmm…no, dear inspector. Not this time. I think this time I should like to be paid […]
Tags: bootblack, botter, cabbie, fiction, hansom cab, horse, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, shit
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 16 Comments »
The Cream of the Crop
Monday, December 8th, 2008
November, 1857. “LIE back and close your eyes, and I shall deliver a creamy surprise!” I said, as I unsheathed my raging Lord Palmerston, which was, by now, stiffer than a corpse lying in a lake on a freezing cold winter’s day. “Mmmm,” Mrs. Bapps replied, licking her lips. “Sounds delicious!” “Jolly good!” I said, […]
Tags: botter, ejaculate, fiction, humour, Inspector Spunkleford, intercourse, Lord Likely, Lord Palmerston, Mr. Poots, Mrs. Bapps, mystery
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 12 Comments »
Wherein His Lordship Has His Cake And Proceeds To Eat It
Tuesday, December 2nd, 2008
November, 1857 “Well then, sir,” purred the beautiful, buxom baker Mrs. Bapps as she leant forward, giving me another glorious glimpse of her heaving bosom. “Do you see anything you would like?” “Rather!” I beamed. “Yes?” she continued, scooping up some cream from off of the top of a nearby cake with her finger, and […]
Tags: botter, cake, fiction, foreplay, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, Mrs. Bapps
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 16 Comments »
Bapps and Buns
Thursday, November 27th, 2008
November, 1857. AS I stood contemplating my next move, my ponderings were suddenly interrupted by the arrival of Inspector Albert Spunkleford of Scotland Yard, who bounded across the road toward me, huffing and puffing as he put his sizeable frame through such clearly untypical exertions. “Ah! Likely!” he wheezed. “Jolly good to see you, old […]
Tags: botter, fiction, fun, hot buns, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, Mrs. Bapps
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 15 Comments »
An Incredible Inter-Active Adventure
Saturday, November 22nd, 2008
November, 1857. THE fog hung about the streets of London like an unwanted guest at a party, getting in everyone’s way and generally souring the mood somewhat. Unlike an unwanted guest at a party, however, the fog was considerably harder to eject, being as it was a formless cloud of minute water droplets. “Blasted fog!” […]
Tags: Bilgecranny Lane, botter, fiction, fun, hot buns, humour, Incredible Interactive Adventure, Inspector Spunkleford, Lord Likely, shoes
Posted in The Bastard Bootblack Of Bilgecranny Lane | 12 Comments »
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About His Lordship
Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.
Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing
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Send his lordship your letters, nude pictographs, declarations of love and wads of cash by clicking upon the most handsome stamp above!
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