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"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."


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"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."


"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."


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  • The Crest of Lord Likely

    Archive for January, 2008

    In Which Botter Has A Simply Smashing Time

    Thursday, January 31st, 2008

    May the First, Eighteen Fifty-One. “Aye,” said Harry Flashman, leaning in to get a closer look at the Koh-i-Noor Diamond, now believed to be a fake. “I’ll say we have a mystery on our hands. This one is definitely not the real thing.” “Now, Mr. Flashman, are you absolutely certain? I need you to be […]

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    Posted in Lord Likely And The Flash Man | 11 Comments »

    Interlude: Perfection in a Top Hat

    Sunday, January 27th, 2008

    January, 1857. I have long suspected that I am the very paragon of perfection. That may sound like cheap, lazy arrogance, but when one is as continually astounding as I, and blessed with such devastatingly good looks, it is hard not to come to the conclusion that I must be the very last word in […]

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    Posted in Random Insertions | 25 Comments »

    The Disturbing Dilema of the Disappearing Diamond

    Thursday, January 24th, 2008

    May 1st, 1851 Mr. Harry Flashman, my man-servant Botter and my fantastically fabulous self made quick on our collective legs, and dashed off to try and escape the oncoming police, who had been alerted to our presence by our fantastically furious bout of fisticuffs just moments before. As we sprinted through the bustling aisles of […]

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    Posted in Lord Likely And The Flash Man | 9 Comments »

    A Great Big Punch Up at the Great Exhibition

    Monday, January 21st, 2008

    May the First, 1851. With nothing but revenge filling my heart and my thoughts, I marched on after Mr. Harry Flashman, and the three Indian beauties he had just swiped from under my noble nose. I fully intended to show the swaggering cock-end exactly what happens to the man foolish enough to interfere with my […]

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    Posted in Lord Likely And The Flash Man | 15 Comments »

    Lord Likely and the Kingdom of the Crystal Pig

    Thursday, January 17th, 2008

    May the 1st, 1851. After being released from gaol by Inspector Albert Spunkleford, I made it my first point of business to put as much distance between myself and my detestable former cell-mate, Mr. Harry Flashman. I hailed a passing hansom cab, and headed back to the Crystal Palace, leaving Flash Harry to be fawned […]

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    Posted in Lord Likely And The Flash Man | 12 Comments »

    When Harry Met Likely

    Tuesday, January 15th, 2008

    January 15th, 1857. Now, where the bloody hell was I? Ah, yes. May 1st, 1851. “Harry who?” I asked, although to be honest my actual interest in my cell-mate was extremely minimal. “Harry Flashman,” repeated the fellow, “I imagine you have heard of me, of course.” He grinned with self-satisfaction and pride, characteristics I was […]

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    Posted in Lord Likely And The Flash Man | 10 Comments »

    Intermission: Wherein Lord Likely is Well Liked

    Saturday, January 12th, 2008

    January the 12th, 1857. I know I have just commenced upon the recollection of another of my astonishing adventures, and I acknowledge that it is rather bad form to interrupt my latest tale so soon in proceedings, but I have some news to impart to you all which simply cannot wait. At any rate, these […]

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    Posted in Random Insertions | 15 Comments »

    In Which His Lordship Makes An Exhibition of Himself.

    Thursday, January 10th, 2008

    January the Tenth, 1857. To be quite honest, the year eighteen fifty-seven has so far been rather disappointing. I’m aware that the year is still very much in its infancy, but infant or not, this year must try damned harder or it shall feel my boot in its backside. Why, I have only gotten drunk […]

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    Posted in Lord Likely And The Flash Man | 9 Comments »

    Self-Help, the Victorian Way.

    Tuesday, January 8th, 2008

    January, 1857. – Lord Likely ***** Next time in The Astonishing Adventures of Lord Likely: His lordship clashes with another Victorian rogue, in a special one-off adventure! (We promise it will happen, this time.) Attention! There are still two days left to vote for his lordship’s journals as being ‘The Best Blog You’ve Never Heard […]

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    Posted in Random Insertions | 15 Comments »

    The Golden Cock Rises Again

    Friday, January 4th, 2008

    January the 4th, 1857. And so the new year is finally here, thrust upon us like the unwanted child of a filthy whore, crying and spewing and urinating all over the carpet. It is customary at the start of a new year for the Queen (God Save Her and Roger Her Senseless) to unveil her […]

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    Posted in Random Insertions | 21 Comments »

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    About His Lordship

    Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.

    Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing

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