Likely's Whore-Box

Praise For Lord Likely

"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."


"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."


"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."


"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."


"Hear ye, hear ye, Lord Likely is fucking ace!"


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  • The Crest of Lord Likely

    10 September 2014

    Duck Me

    LAST WEEK I broke the frankly earth-shattering news that I was to be releasing an electronic book of one of my most astonishing adventures very soon. Nations rejoiced, and there was much hugging and heavy-petting in the streets that day.

    Whilst you wait for this most important of literary works, I thought I would direct you towards another electronic book featuring my good self, which you can purchase RIGHT THIS INSTANT.

    Yes, dear readers, your eyes do not deceive you! For you see, a few years ago my scribe, Mr. A. D Fanton, teamed up with the enigmatic and acronymic author known as MCM. The fruits of their sordid little collaboration was a short tale entitled ‘The Man With The Improbable Leg’, which saw me enter into a partnership with A TALKING DUCK.

    I’m not sure if I was heavily drunk at the time and hallucinated the entire episode, but it certainly sounds like it. Behold the book’s synopsis:

    “While vacationing in London, Archimedes and Finley the foul-mouthed telekinetic fish find themselves caught up in a strange murder plot that reaches into the upper echelons of social power… including the formidable Lord Likely, who fastens his belt long enough to avenge the death of a favourite lover. But as a greater plot unfolds, Archimedes and Likely find themselves on a collision course… one that may unravel the very social fabric of Great Britain, and let ninjas and bombastic Irish midgets run free!”

    See what I mean? Utter insanity.

    In any case, this is a fun little curio, and as it features me it is instantly rendered indispensable, especially as it only costs seventy-seven English pence (or one dollar and thirty-three cents if you are one of those former colonials).

    It may be purchased via The Amazon (branches everywhere), HERE if you are a resident of the British Isles, or HERE if you are in the New Country.

    Feel free to put this duck-based adventure on your bill. BILL! Ah-haha!


    – Lord Likely.

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    About His Lordship

    Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.

    Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing

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    Send his lordship your letters, nude pictographs, declarations of love and wads of cash by clicking upon the most handsome stamp above!

    Enjoyed the journals? Then why not donate a few shillings, by clicking 'pon the button above!

    All funds raised go towards his lordship's drinking fund, with absolutely NO proceeds going to the homeless or any other filthy wastrels

    The Likely Empire


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